Lily, Russ and I are going to Lily’s first ever trip to a planetarium Friday. The last time Russ and I went to one was a few months before I got pregnant. I think she will be in heaven (we’ve waited this long so that there wouldn’t be any fear of the dark/big). She and I talked about it this evening and I think she will love it.
After the planetarium presentation, there will be a guided science experiment outdoors. I explained this to her tonight and asked her if she knew what an experiment was.
“Yep! It’s a big, big box, full of stuff… full! And, I have to scoop stuff out, put it here… the yucky stuff there. And then it would be all done.”
Ok then!
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She’s taken to helping me vacuum, clean up, putting the food away, and managing London. These are her choices.
She drove her car with Papa today from the house to the park. She tried to play with a little girl who didn’t want to play, and eventually she redirected her attention to an older boy that arrived. I was not there, so Russ explained. It seems she is somewhat disappointed (visibly) sometimes when other children don’t respond to her as she wishes or hopes they will, or even in turn/responsive, but she seems to be able to quickly regather herself and try with another child, without exhibiting hurt or dejection. (At least, I hope that’s what I’m seeing.)
I was not the sort of kid who took it well when others ignored or avoided me, for whatever reason. In fact, from about the age of 3, I think I had already been burned so many times that I had lost interest in trying. I spent my childhood in a “receiving” of friendship role, but never tried to create one. I don’t know exactly what set that into motion, but I know how it felt, and can feel it even now. I still do not initiate friendships, and honestly, over the years I think I adapted to the point where I now have little tolerance for lots of “friends”; it exhausts me. I don’t want Lily to experience life this way.
I’m not certain how to help her develop friendships, and I don’t think it’s really my place to do it for her either. What I can do is be present and when another child treats her in a manner that hurts, (at this age anyway) I step in as a mediator and directly address both children, with a transparency and bluntness that usually makes them both squirm a bit. My hope is that by calling their attention directly to the feelings that are present, what hurts and motives seem present, and offer solutions that build them both up and hopefully allow for the growth of a friendship or simply a positive interaction with one another, she will remain as resilient as she seems to be now, and learn what I never did. And that she will be spared the hurt I dealt with that was so crippling and unnecessary.
Which planetarium are you going to?
I am afraid I went only once to a planetarium in my life. I have always been fascinated by stars, but have never spent much time looking at them, or recognizing constellations–most of my life I have been in areas to polluted by lights. The only time I was in perfect conditions to see a wonderful sky was… in the south hemisphere. Of course, I could not recognize anything.
Back to Bugz: I hope that, where you have, you have less light pollution and she can enjoy a real night sky–including a nice view of the milky way.
She can! We can actually see it. And stars… like, oh, more than 10 across the entire sky. Crazy, huh. THEN there’s the small other little part of things, that being the galaxy that is in her room. We got her a StarTheatre Pro (the non-toy kind) and have the planets in our ss, the constellations, the entire milky way, and the sun. In fact, she mentioned just the other night that we needed to send you (Thierry) something special concerning this topic, so watch your mail. 🙂 She is pleased you no longer have sprinkles on your face – she thinks you’re a good friend again.
The planetarium is at the college in Alamosa, and we learned today that they are closing it after a 70+ year run and always having been open free to the public. I think there’s more going on than the guy who has basically been its heartbeat for the last 35 years is able to communicate (he’s a bit pessimistic about the whole thing), but I’m bummed that it might be gone completely in just a month or so. That means Durango or the Springs, or Denver. Russ and I love it and Lils did well (1 – 2:30 and she basically pulled it off, with only a few moments of complaint).
They had a display of the planets there on posts, in line, similar to how they were when we were kids, with size dimensions somewhat accurate, and Pluto. Lily decided she needed a Pluto too, and was convinced that the mailman somehow lost poor Pluto when he delivered the rest of the Solar System to our door. SOOO…. we will now be locating a hallow something that glows and call it Plutotooto I imagine.